An Education

I was lucky to catch this film after my STPM as it wasn't even aired in Malaysian Cinemas. Haha. I got it through the traditional illegal way. (my friend downloaded it =p). This is a very unique "coming of age" movie. In the London suburbs of 1961, life was pleasant, but not exciting. It first introduced the lead character whom is Jenny, a 16-year-old girl. She is bright, pretty and on her way to be accepted into Oxford University.
But her uneventful life changed when she met David, a man almost twice her age. He soon charmed her and they began a romantic relationship. David introduced her to his friends and together, they explored cultural activities. He was able to convince her parents by going all out to prove that his interest in her is not improper. They allowed him to take her to concerts, dinners and even to Paris. Back then in the 1960's, going to Paris was a very exotic thing to do. The colours soon came to Jenny's life and she was the talk among her friends in school for dating an older man and being able to see Paris.
"Silly schoolgirls are always getting seduced by glamorous older men."

Jenny soon got accustomed to the life David and his companions showed her. Along the way, she began to question the true meaning of life. Is life all about studying and working hard to be happy? Doing the same routined boring things every day and following the norm of society. Is there more to life than these? Instead of studying all the difficult studies, she could have fled to Paris and experience love living the life she had been dreaming of. David could easily offer to her all those.
"Studying is hard and boring. Teaching is hard and boring. So, what you're telling me is to be bored, and then bored, and finally bored again, but this time for the rest of my life? This whole stupid country is bored! There's no life in it, or color, or fun! It's probably just as well the Russians are going to drop a nuclear bomb on us any day now. So my choice is to do something hard and boring, or to marry my... Jew, and go to Paris and Rome and listen to jazz, and read, and eat good food in nice restaurants, and have fun! It's not enough to educate us anymore Ms. Walters. You've got to tell us why you're doing it."

When David proposed, she made the decision to forgo her studies. She dropped out from school. Okay, now the following will be spoilers. Jenny later learned of David's way of making money. Going to concerts, fancy dinners and art galleries, she realized they were all just a temporary phase. One day while taking Jenny and her parents for dinner, Jenny found a stack of letters in David's car and she discovered his deepest secret. She began to regret her decisions but all seemed too late already as she had already dropped out from school. All her classmates had already sat for the A levels and on their way to their respective universties. But of course, at the end, there is always a savior. None other than Jenny's class teacher. =)

Okay, to summarize, the reason why I love this movie apart from the vintage style, music and breathtakingly beautiful settings (Paris!!!), it conveys a very deep meaning especially for coming of age teens. This is the movie which I can really relate to. Although I'm no longer a teen but I'm still a "coming of age" adult. Haha. Sometimes, we wonder is life really worth living if it's the same old typical and boring ones every day. Having to study, going for exams, all the stress, they are all really weighing us down. We definitely reflect once in a while wondering, will doing all those make us happy? How wonderful my life would have been if I could meet a man who would show me places, bring me on tours, bring excitement and adventure into my life. Instead of having to study the amazingly bulky syllabus and going for exams. It's too difficult.

But there is a beautiful message being laid out from the movie. The truth? "There is no shortcut to achieve the life we want. School, study is sometime boring and hard, but we get educated, we learnt the meaning of life from it." =). This is very true. There is really no easy way in life. Everything is difficult. The only good things that come from easy ways are only temporary. By going through the hard way, we learn. We learn great values of life. =)

Here is the trailer of the movie. Highly recommended folks ;)

Blissful 2011

It's the first day of the New Year yo. Since it's new year, we are supposed to look forward and make a new beginning. But how come I don't feel a sense of liberation. haha. Perhaps because my exam is next week and celebrating events leave me heavy hearted.

I remember those silly times where I used to wish for a time machine. When it was 2007, I wished for a time machine to go back to June 2006. A time where I presumed was one of the greatest moment that happened to me. I was dead wrong of course. Haih. Can never go back. No matter how bleak and ugly the present is.

Happy new year again. New year resolutions? To be content and strong. =)

Pale Blue Eyes =)

Sometimes I feel so happy,
Sometimes I feel so sad.
Sometimes I feel so happy,
But mostly you just make me mad.
Baby, you just make me mad.
Linger on, your pale blue eyes.
Linger on, your pale blue eyes.

Thought of you as my mountain top,
Thought of you as my peak.
Thought of you as everything,
I've had but couldn't keep.
I've had but couldn't keep.
Linger on, your pale blue eyes.
Linger on, your pale blue eyes.

If I could make the world as pure and strange as what I see,
I'd put you in the mirror,
I put in front of me.
I put in front of me.
Linger on, your pale blue eyes.
Linger on, your pale blue eyes.

Skip a life completely.
Stuff it in a cup.
She said, Money is like us in time,
It lies, but can't stand up.
Down for you is up."
Linger on, your pale blue eyes.
Linger on, your pale blue eyes.

It was good what we did yesterday.
And I'd do it once again.
The fact that you are married,
Only proves, you're my best friend.
But it's truly, truly a sin.
Linger on, your pale blue eyes.
Linger on, your pale blue eyes.



I find the lyrics a tad sad and touching but hauntingly beautiful. I think there's actually a story behind this song. Seems like he's in love with someone whose attached. Perhaps, even indulged in a short term relationship with her but it has to end soon. None the less, still love the song =)

The right way

Thinkin back to the time when I was so into you
I thought that I knew it all
my perception of love
well it was something to do
but I didn't expect the thought
I understand your feelings of doubt
I know I must have let you down
but I wonder would you be around
if I loved you the right way
Loved you the right way
I would have put that smile upon your face
Loved you the right way
Never thought that I'd thank you for the hurt and the pain
and the changes you put me through
I guess I needed to look at my intentions again
I didn't give enough to you
My mind has never been so clear
and I feel my happiness is near
But I wonder if you'd still be here if I loved you the right way
coz you deserve the right way
I should have put that smile upon your face
I should have kept you in my warm embrace
Loved you the right way
Sometimes love is so mistaken
simple values put aside
Mind love is just a ride
When it's over no one seems to care
If i ever find myself with someone new
I'll remember what I learned from you
Yeah
and I will love her the right way
love her the right way
I will put that smile on her face
I will keep her warm in my embrace
I will love her baby
make each day a better day
never gonna sacrifice a mean
I will love her the right way
I'm gonna love her baby
I'm gonna love her baby



Opss.. the video clip is so... hehe. but don't focus on that ya. just listen to the song ;)

When will I see your face again..

Here I Am, Everyday,
Since You Said, You'd Come Again,
But It's Not Fair, Cos You're Not Here,
I Wait In Vain, But Nothing Has Chaaanged,

I'm A Flower, Soaking In The Rain,
If I Could Wish One Thing, I'd Hear You Call My Name,

So When Will I See Your Face Again,
When Will You Touch My Life Again (ohh yeah),
When Will I Breathe You In Again (ha),
I Think I Love Youuu...Will I See Your Face Again,

Little Thing, Like The Rain Coming,
She Looked At Me A Certain Kind Of Way,
Tell Me Girl, Where Are You Nowww,
'Cos I Don't Know How Much Longer I can Waaait,

I'm A Dreamer, Waiting For The Sun,
When You're Coming In, I know My Life's Begun,
Tell Me Girl...


When Will I See Your Face Again (ohh yeaaah),
When Will You Touch My Life Again (ummm um),
When Will I Breathe You In Again,
I Think I Love Youuu, Will I See Your Face Again,

You Know That All My Life I've Been Waaaiting,
Waiting For Sooome, Someone Like You To Love Me,
You Can't Come By Like An Angel, Into My Life,
And then Fly Awaaaay, Flyyyyyy Away,

Oh Honey, Cos I, Uh Baby, Ba Ba Doo Yeah, Ohh ohhhh,
Sing, I've Only Seen Youuu, Oh, I Said, Uh huh, I Said I Said, Yeah (woo)


When Will I See Your Face Again (I Wanna See You Once In My Life),
When Will You Touch My Life Again, (Wanna See You Twice In My Life),
When Will I Breathe You In Again (ohhh),
I Think I Love Youuu, Will I See Your Face Again,

I said, see Bap pa da doo ba ba (ohhh),
Bap Ba Doo Yeah, That's What We Do Yeaahhh (ohh),
When Will iii See Your Face Again My Friend,
Oh Yeah, I Think You Gotta Let Me Know Yeah,
Ohh Yeahhh...

Jamie Scott & The Town - When Will I See Your Face Again

Wow, the girl is so pretty. I love her skin and sense of dressing. Really chic =)

As said before, I will be sharing my ups and downs. But now looking back, it seems like there are more downs than ups. Or was it I was too lazy to share any ups. At this moment now, the only word to describe my feelings is helplessness. So much sadness and hurt. I feel so defeated. In earlier posts, I mentioned about needs without expectation. It seems like bullshit to me now. haha. I'm not superhuman. It's always so easy to say. But when you wanna put it to practice? Haha... that's when the problem comes. Very hard to accept the fact. So painful to embrace reality. One fall after another. Haha. Like it's cursed. Forever out of reach. So pathethic I guess. Can't get rid of the sudden hurt overnight. Dunno, just want to be a normal person tonight and cry.

I just got lost

"The bottom line, life is about learning, whether you're in school or not. We are humans. We make mistakes. But your lowest moment might also be the one where you begin to rise, and rise. So, double back. Regroup. Brush yourself off, and try again. "

=)